The Call to Train Our Children
I remember the day I found out I was pregnant with our first child. It was so unexpected and unplanned. I had not truly considered the changes that a child would bring in our lives – we weren’t even discussing children at that point.
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It was that day – August 16, 2001 – that I realized the huge responsibility that lay ahead of me as a mom; that lay ahead of us as parents. I also realize now, eight years later, that God shielded me from the magnitude of that responsibility for it would easily have been overwhelming.
The magnitude of the responsibility we have as parents is difficult to grasp. Some parents think that if their kids don’t end up pregnant and unwed, addicted to drugs or alcohol, or wind up in jail or prison, then their kids have turned out all right. They have succeeded in their role as parents. The reality is that God calls us to a much higher standard. He calls us to do more than a mediocre job at parenting. He calls us to excellence. Perfection? No. Excellence. There’s a difference.
Perfection is something unattainable, so unreachable that many people give up and head down the mediocre route thinking they can never attain perfection. They’re right. Perfection is elusive. Excellence, however, is not. Excellence is hearing the call from God to train your children and then pursuing it wholeheartedly. We, as parents, are given a specific charge in Deuteronomy 6:4-9.
"Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up."
It’s a charge we can’t take lightly. It applies to every parent. There are no exceptions. It’s a profound responsibility, and in our own strength we are ill-equipped to carry it out. This charge requires preparation, determination, steadfastness and faithfulness. We can no longer hold back in fear of our kids hating us. We don’t have time to worry about what our kids will think if they find out all the mistakes we made as teenagers. We must face the challenge head on. We must realize that it is not the responsibility of the church to spiritually train our children, though the church plays a role in it. It’s the parent’s responsibility. Take note of verse 7. “Impress them on your children.” That instruction makes it clear that it is the parent’s role to parent, to train, to teach, to guide.
"Sons are a heritage from the LORD, children a reward from him." Psalm 127:3
Our children are a reward; a gift from the Lord. What we do with our children reflects our love for God and our obedience to him.
Training our children spiritually requires a change in thinking on the part of the parents. First, look up Deuteronomy 6:4-9 in your own Bible. Ask the Holy Spirit to equip you for this challenge and prepare you to train your children. Next, you can find many great books to help you begin this process of change. One I enjoy is “Shift” by Brian Haynes. It’s a great tool to help you get started in parenting your children, and to help you understand the call that parents must answer in training their children.
We are called by God to train our children. Let’s answer the call with excellence.
— Carly Engibous
Carly Engibous is a Christ-follower, wife, mother, daughter, sister and aunt living in Frisco, Texas.
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